They say that making affirming statements engenders positive attributes in a family. I’ve worked on repeating several at regular intervals since I first heard this parenting tip. The kids can complete them after hearing the first word or two: “Dixons never quit!” “Wickedness never was happiness!” And, to nip the pleading and the whining in the bud, “You can only PRAY if it’s your DAY!”

Tonight, a new affirming statement was born. As we sat around the table talking about our best and worst, Jared let out a zinger. “My worst part was that my friend Jordan called me a nerd.” Hurt was obvious on his face.

We all offered advice. The mother bear in me: “Well, if Grandma Harris were here she would tell you to kick him in the shins! And I think you should!” Seth, reassuring: “I find the name “Nerd” to be a compliment. Hey, I call myself a nerd, and I think it’s great!” Caroline, commiserating with newly learned kindergarten wisdom: “Emma Sattler used to be my friend. And now I don’t play with her because she’s rude!”

We pondered the fact that anyone being mean is just trying to fill up a hole in their psyche, something the kids like to call “Having issues.”

Finally, we remembered that there are FOUR Dixons at Lena Whitmore. Including one very large, burly, sixth-grade Dixon. We could take anyone on, anytime they insulted one of us! Then, Mike uttered our new family statement: “Yeah . . . like they say in Mexico, you fight one bean, you fight the whole burrito!”

Tonight, a real conversation I had last week with the trophy shop. I thought the Pinewood Derby Trophies were a little silly. Besides being totally cheesy, they also make a big hole in my miniscule budget, so I figured we'd pass out a matchbox car with a little candy on the side and call it good. That would be BEFORE I talked to some cubs about the importance of the hunk of wood with a crummy little metal plaque.

So I called the trophy shop last Tuesday, 9 days before the Derby. Although there was a hint of desperation in my voice from realizing that I had waited too long to do the impromptu poll, the lady stated in a stern voice "We have a firm policy that we never accept orders over the phone. You must be present in the store to place the order."

I sighed and spoke from my heart: "Oh, shoot! I was really hoping to avoid coming into your store twice, since all my small children are really interested in the breakable stuff that's all over your shop."

Pause, then with no hint of humor or acknowledgement "The total will be $39.95, and you can pick it up next Tuesday. Is there anything else you need?"

No exaggeration needed on this one. Ahh, the power of small children to manipulate!

Booted out of my own bedroom, I am sitting out here in the kitchen at 2:51 am wishing I could think of something useful to do. Gather up some laundry? Get a head start on Sunday dinner for my family and Tamsin and Dave? Call Mike in DC while he's peacefully slumbering away in his hotel room and help him share in the joy of parenting? The last idea holds some real appeal, but since I've been reading articles on celestial marriage on the church website for the last 30 minutes, there's just enough guilt involved to tip the scales against it. Well, and they're 3 hours ahead of us, so it looses too much shock value.

No joke, Julia came down with a high fever 93 minutes after I pointed out to Mike that our kids always got really sick when he headed off to a business trip. She's been on a steady diet of ibuprophen ever since (and the guy who invented? discovered? that stuff should get the Nobel Prize!). Currently, I am questioning our decision to continue to have her sleep in our room instead of walling the living room off and turning it into her sleeping quarters. Well, I'm questioning most of our decisoins right now. . . I've worked with her for a long time tonight, and finally decided to do the howl it out. The choice most people would question (especially Mike if he were here), is taking her to the Cougar-Husky game this afternoon. But the rush of going into a packed Beasley Coliseum was worth it all! And going with a wildly enthusiastic Jared made it even better. I hope I'm including a picture with a poster completely executed by him that he thinks got on TV. Did you see him?